Darwin Awards of 2012 
The top winner
1. When his 38 
            caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a 
            hold-up in Long Beach , California , would-be robber James Elliot 
            did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the 
            barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it 
            worked.
The Runner Ups
2. 
            The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting 
            machine and after a little shopping around, submitted a claim to his 
            insurance company. The company, expecting negligence, sent out one 
            of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he 
            also lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.
 3. 
            A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car 
            during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a 
            woman had taken the space.. Understandably, he shot her.
4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies.. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.
4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies.. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.
5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.
6. 
            A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the 
            counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash 
            drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the 
            register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash 
            from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The 
            total amount of cash he got from the drawer... $15. [If someone 
            points a gun at you ..then 
            gives you money, has a crime been committed?] 
 7. 
            Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly.. He decided 
            that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, 
            grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved 
            it over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back and 
            hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The 
            liquor store window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was 
            caught on videotape...
 8. 
            As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man 
            grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the 
            woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. 
            Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher.. They put him 
            in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out 
            of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he 
            replied, "Yes, officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the 
            purse from."
 9.. 
            The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a 
            Burger King in Ypsilanti , Michigan at 5 A.M., flashed a gun, and 
            demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't 
            open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered 
            onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast... 
            The man, frustrated, walked away. [*A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD winner!]
10. 
            When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on 
            a Seattle street by sucking on a hose, he got much more than he 
            bargained for.. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man 
            curled up next to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police 
            spokesman said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline, 
            but he plugged his siphon hose into the motor home's sewage tank by 
            mistake. The owner of the vehicle declined to press charges saying 
            that it was the best laugh he'd ever had. 
Thank you, Sherri for sending this to me...couldn't resist not posting it! 
 
 


Too funny
ReplyDelete